It has been a while since any new writing, I admit. In May, I had to undergo ten hours of surgery to revise (for the 6th and 7th times) my left hip. I had a great surgical team, a great hospital and a great physical therapy experience. Then, happily, I went home.
Having been through this a total of nine times now (yes, the right hip is iffy, too), I knew the Gray Days would hit. These are the days or weeks of feeling tired, spaced out, generally toasted and just plain done. The hospital days, and the first few days home, call up one's inner fortitude and sense of humor, and the happy drugs don't hurt, either. Eventually, though, the boring and painful part hits and one needs tools.
Mindfulness. I am thrilled to see so much written and talked about these days around this tool, this lifestyle. I tend to get hooked into the negative when in pain, and mindfulness practices are just the ticket for this. There are countless excellent practices. The one I found most helpful this time around was simply allowing whatever feeling was distracting me. If it was a sense of anxiety about the end result, I would breathe and allow that feeling. If it was a nagging pain, I would ice the area and breathe with the feeling.
These ideas can sound, well, trite. They are, in fact, powerful tools. Thich Nhat Hanh instructs us to honor feelings, to be generous and tender with ourselves. I don't think most of us are too familiar with that idea! Get over it, be a grownup, quit whining are more to the point for many as a result of our training and resultant inner voice. We can change that.
By simply allowing feelings to arise, to be gentle and watch them, I could feel the discomfort and angst melt away. Slowly but surely, melt away. Energy returns, a sense of focus and of peace. Growth is back in the room.
Happily, I am back at LifeWorks!, still working on my healing, my ability to walk properly again. I am enjoying work, sharing the physio-synthesis technique which has saved my life over and over again. Great stuff, that.
Life is good. Be mindful of it.